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Why is Dating So Much More Difficult Nowadays?

Updated: Jul 31, 2022

Whether you are a man or a woman, I'm sure we can all agree that dating is difficult and it isn't getting any easier. The following are my opinions and my views on why dating is becoming much more difficult for both men and women. I would argue all the following points are interconnected to some degree.

  1. Social Media - I'm sure you already know the advantages and disadvanatages of social

media. From a dating standpoint, social media allows you to advertise yourself to anyone anywhere in the world. It has opened up the dating pool from your town to

the whole world. With cheap flights available, it is not unheard of for people to meet online and take a 30€ flight to meet.

2. Paradox of Choice - Because of social media and dating apps, there is an endless list of choice. Now this is much more of an issue for women as women are the ones that generally receive direct messages and comments from men, rather than the other way around. When I say from men, I mean from random men. Men they do not know or have never met. This is why it is crucial as a guy to level up each aspect of their life because they are in huge competition with other men. A successful man in Germany can easily message a beautiful girl in England and have an extremely good chance of getting somewhere with her which means all the guys in England in her town/city have to worry about people in this town/city but also internationally. But who is to say there isn't another guy in Italy who is a little more confident and more fun than the guy in Germany. Who should the girl choose? Maybe both of them?

3. Lower attention span - Because of the vast amount of choice at our fingertips. In every aspect of life, we have choice. And we have choice easily. Online shopping, supermarkets, abundance of people to connect with. Everything and everyone can easily be replaced, therefore if you are talking to someone and you don't like them, working through problems with them and taking the time to discuss whatever is the issue is much more difficult than actually finding someone new to entertain you.

4. The Superior Complex - People are assessing themselves at a much higher level than what the dating market would value them at. What I mean by that is, for example, if a woman rates herself at an 8, that is her evaluation of herself. It is nice for her confidence and self-esteem, however, if she isn't attracting men who would go for an "8", then the dating market isn't valuing herself at that number. And the same goes the other around too. Unfortunately, whoever you are interested in are the ones that give you your true value as they are dating you. It is a bitter pill to swallow for a lot of people, especially women, knowing that their self evaluation is usually much higher than what men would value them at. Remember, attraction value is different to relationship value. If someone finds you are attractive, it doesn't mean they want a relationship with you. It just means from a sexual standpoint, you are ticking boxes.

Here are the 4 main points from my point of view as to why the dating market is much more difficult for both men and women.

Book a session if you want to find out how to use the dating market to your advantage and to become valuable in the eyes of your dating partners.

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